Well, better late than never!? It’s no secret that the entire wedding process had me pulled in every direction under the sun and my sweet blog was left in the dust. But because the post wedding activity depression is upon me, and I want to relive every moment and also perhaps since the end of my sweet sweet summer is eminent, let’s go back to June and party with my Flock of Beezy’s shall we?
We are married and the chaos this year has brought with all of the wedding planning is finally behind us!
Desi and I were married in my childhood home in the yard on July 22 with 250 of our nearest and dearest. The entire day was a dream come true and the only words we can use to describe the day are: perfect & epic. I may or may not have ended up in the pool with my dress. Like I said epic.
The honeymoon is officially over as Desi headed back to work today and we are ready to get into our rhythm and continue our fairytale.
I’ll leave you bums with just a little sneak as I patiently await more pictures along with you.
We have felt your aloha throughout this ride, we are truly blessed.
Last weekend we were invited to the Friends and Family ride preview for the new Guardians of the Galaxy ride at Disney’s California Adventure. Which meant waking up at 5 am to get to the park by 7. Keep in mind if you are planning on conquering GOTG: Mission Breakout this summer, there were already crowds of people lined up to get their fast pass and wait in line 2 hours before the park even opened. We however, were able to walk right on, which I am thankful for because if you saw my Instastory that day you know that the nerves were so real!!
I hope you all had a wonderful Memorial Day and allowed yourselves to reflect on the sacrifice so many before us and after us make to ensure we live in a free country that stands by the Declaration of Independence and allow us a holiday weekend to officially kick off summer.
I was showered with so much love this weekend, it is overwhelming. My mom, sister, cousins and aunts, as well as my Flock of Flamingo bridal party threw me the most Salty Bum perfect bridal shower I could have dreamed of. It was more than my little aloha heart could handle.
Exactly two months since my last post.
I take full responsibility. Wedding plans have overtaken my life and we added in the fun of finding our first home!
So to say things have been a little chaotic is a bit of an understatement.
But I am here, thank you all for your patience, support and aloha. You’re the best bums a girl could ask for!
Yesterday marked exactly four months until my wedding day. And yes, I did have a complete and utter freak out/meltdown/cry feast. Why? Because I simply needed it. I needed to take a moment to get sad, to let it out and feel every emotion I need to feel before I marry the love of my life.
All of my anxiety over the wedding stems from my fear that it will be here way too fast, when I’m not ready. When I’m not ready in regards to; did I enjoy every second of being engaged? have I really soaked it all in before this huge moment in my life? I mean, this is a moment that any little girl dreams about and fantasizes over since she is a little girl and then POOF! faster than the fairy godmother appears, and she’s all grown up and walking down the aisle! Um, did I miss something? Let’s go back and start all over again, I’ll be ready this time I swear!
Over the past few weeks, I have really felt God changing my heart. It has been the coolest thing. He has calmed my fears of moving away from my family and making me strong and capable to step into this next chapter clear headed. He truly has heard my prayers of desperation and fear, of clarity and guidance. Until yesterday.
This overwhelming anxiety crept up on me so quickly and shook me. You know what the trigger was? Typing in the addresses for the invitations and asking my mom “Are my Uncle Steve’s Steven or Stephen!?” To which she said one was StevAn, um, okay mom I know for sure that’s not right. And my lack of patience for that spelling error erupted into tears and hiding under the covers. (Sorry Uncle Steve’s).
I chose to close my computer, exit out of my Pinterest browser and leave every task sent from my wedding planner to the wayside and just cry for the day. An hour and half phone call from my best friend, being by my side and distracting me calmed me down and she assured me that this is all okay. To take the day and just feel every emotion I need to feel.
While on my “clarity run” as I like to call them I asked myself why did this reaction happen? Why am I feeling this way when I so noticeably had felt a change in my heart recently. And it hit me, I wasn’t spending time with God. I had let my devotionals fall to the wayside, I wasn’t diving into His word, I didn’t need my quiet morning time any more because I was where I needed to be. Well, he sure slapped the sense back into me, I need Him.
I had totally taken for granted the sense of peace and tranquility that came when I was so desperately seeking His guidance, once I had my answer I kept on going without Him. I think it is so easy for us to do, we only go to Him when we need something. Like a preteen who only talks to their parents for a $20 bill before walking out the door. So I encourage you all to invest and immerse yourself a smidge more into your relationship with Christ.
He will change your heart and change your perspective.
He will reassure you and make visible the abundance of blessings in each of our lives.
I can lean into Him the next time I simply just need to cry. And we all know, that it is bound to happen.
Damn, who knew I was such an emotional person!?
This is it! Go time! There is less than 7 days until Valentines day, a day where us women are expecting diamonds, flowers, chocolates, silky fabrics & to be wined and dined from our men.
I want to be fulfilled.
I want a job that I love.
I want a job I can be creative in.
I want a job I can help people in.
I want a job I know I am a impacting others with.
I want a job thats fun.
I want a job that screams, me.
For me, I am feeling like this dream job can become a reality through this blog. For a while I have just felt off and for a while every post on here where I really open up and lay it all out, there is a bit of sadness mixed in.
So what do we do to fix this?
I have had so much positive feedback on my writing and what I have been creating and absolutely nothing makes me happier. So I am going to embrace this full force!
I am going to dive in deeper into my blog. I am going to make this page a much bigger priority than I have been.
I am going to just take the damn picture. You all know what I mean. I want to do more fashion style posts or photos of me in front of some super dope graphic wall and tell you all a story to go along with it, but I have been too scared. I am scared because I don’t feel worthy enough to “pretend” to be a rad blogger. But ya know what!? Let’s look at the list I just wrote out, about what I want. So girl, if you want it, ya gotta go be it.
What I need, is your help. What do you want to see? How can I help you? What do you want to hear about and what do you get excited about? Tell me what you love about your favorite blogs and why you keep going to their page time and time again!
I love you all and I am so glad you are on this journey with me.
I am so excited to share with you all, my salty bums, that our proposal story was selected to be featured on HowHeAsked.com!
My hope is that our story warms someones heart, and gives them hope that their prince charming is out there waiting for them. It wasn’t too long ago that I was reading posts on How He Asked, daydreaming about a boy I met in high school and what he was up to now.
In the midst of the stress of wedding planning and the routine of everyday life, it was refreshing to relive our special day and get excited for the events to come.
I am truly blessed.